Emotional transparency in relationships: the key to a lasting relationship
One of the keys to a great relationship is emotional transparency. These generally unexpressed emotions can be the deepest ones like fear, sadness, and longing.
Intimacy is about revealing yourself to your partner. For me, I see what intimacy is all about.
One must learn not to blame one’s partner for one’s own emotional reactions. It is also important to take personal responsibility for your own feelings. If you live with an abusive man, you can always leave instead of blaming him or yourself for your situation.
One of the best ways to communicate without guilt mode is to say, “When you did that, I felt sad inside. Generally, men need to learn to communicate more about fear, sadness, and longing, while women need to talk about anger.
Moments of emotional transparency can totally change a relationship for the better. Most of us need a little encouragement to be more open. This is because we don’t want our partner to react. We depend on our partner to have a positive sense of ourselves. We take it easy and do not express what we are really feeling.
When we hide great secrets from our lover, it takes a lot of energy. The art of telling our partner our feelings releases the energy that was previously attached to the efforts to keep those feelings hidden.
Why is it so hard to say that I feel hurt or sad? Most of us have not been taught the importance of emotional transparency. Many of us tend to dismiss our feelings and avoid more negative ones like anger.
However, if you resist feeling negative feelings, you are training yourself not to fully feel feelings like joy and bliss.
If you feel completely negative emotions, they will pass in 5 to 10 seconds. If you resist feeling these relationships, they are stored in your body on some level.
I am not suggesting that you express your anger to your partner in a physical way. If you get angry, it is best to say “I feel angry” and “I need some space.” Get out of the room and walk, dance, or hit the bed to fully express anger in a safe way. When it is no longer provoked, go back and contact your partner.
The best question is “Have I talked to someone about something important that I have not discussed with my partner?”
It takes courage to commit to being emotionally transparent in your relationship. Being able to calm down if your partner reacts is a true mature adult skill. I like to think about the saying, don’t take things personally.
Try to capture your mind when it reacts emotionally to a situation beyond your control. If you see your reaction, you can observe it and notice that it will dissolve in a minute or so. Taking a deep breath and moving your body also helps to divert emotions.