Parenting: Raising Children in Today’s World

Walt Mueller is the founder and president of the Center for Parent/Youth Understanding and has been working with youth and families for 31 years. As a result of his work with CPYU, Walt has become an internationally recognized author and speaker on contemporary youth culture. He has written extensively on youth culture and family issues and is the author of many books.

I had the privilege of spending many hours this past weekend with Walt Mueller. Two years ago my church hired Walt Mueller to come speak to our community. As a member of the Student and Family Ministry Committee, we work with middle and high school students and their families. We recognize the need for parents to try to understand today’s youth culture. Listening to Walt’s presentations this weekend made me realize how different it is for kids growing up today. One of the differences that he noticed; For those of us who grew up in the ’60s and ’70s, there was a more universal standard of what was “right” and “wrong.” Then the media in the ’80s became more focused on “feelings.” Today the media leads us to believe that everyone decides for himself what is “right” and what is “wrong.” It’s a little scary to think about. Children today are bombarded with marketing messages through various media from the time they are babies. Our children are not equipped to accurately interpret the messages they receive. We as parents need to take an active role in being informed of what our children watch on TV, what they read and listen to their music. Another interesting point: Did you know that many other countries require “Media Literacy” as a course requirement in school? Other countries educate their children about the media. They provide you with tools and information to help you process and filter through messaging and the various forms of media today. When children are not given the knowledge or information to help them process the thousands of messages they receive daily, they readily accept what they hear, see, and read. Left alone, children will try to understand their world on their own or with the help of their friends. Have you noticed that marketers are trying to make our children grow and mature beyond their years? The media can be extremely powerful.

Here are some tips to help you and your children navigate through youth culture today.

1. Find out about today’s youth culture. Go to the CPYU website above and search for resources.
2. Be on the lookout for parent education presentations in your community. Our church partnered with our local school district to bring in Walt Mueller to speak. Our school district has a Parent Involvement Network that offers a variety of educational opportunities on parenting and children, several times a month. Does your community offer parenting education/resources?
3. Be aware of what your children are watching on TV Sit down and watch it with them. Ask them questions. Do you believe what you see? Why do you enjoy that show? What do you think of the characters/actors? The behavior of those characters/actors? If there is something that you see that is wrong or does not reflect the values ​​that you want to instill in your children, talk about it. Be sure to point out both the good and the bad (ie not just the bad). Engage in a conversation with them. If you don’t approve of a program, content, or language, please explain why (if it’s not obvious to them).
4. Ask your children about what they are reading. They can be books and/or magazines. Pick it up and read some of it. If you have time, read it in its entirety. Talk about the book or magazine with them. They may be glad that you are interested and want to share with you. Reading what they read can help you understand their world and give you an opportunity to help them process it.
5. Listen to his music. Especially to words. One of the advantages of the internet is that you can almost always find lyrics to songs. Strike up a conversation about it again. Children may not understand the meaning of a song. They just like the melody.

After this weekend, I have a new awareness of youth culture with much more to learn. As a single mom, I know the above tips can sound overwhelming. Our lives are busy. My hope is that you visit the CPYU website. Be more aware of the impact the media is having on your children. Start taking steps to understand today’s youth culture and help your children navigate their world. The world today is a very different place than it was when you were growing up. Do you really want them to accept what the media tells them to believe and value?