Road to College – Protecting Our Daughters – The 4 A’s of Self Defense
Like our babies, we cradled them in our arms when they were little. We kissed them, we nurtured them, we supervised them, we encouraged them, we supported them, we loved them as they grew and matured and… we protected them. As loving parents, protecting our children is not just our responsibility, it’s our passion. But how do we protect them when we are physically separated from them and they from us?
How do we ensure your safety in a world that is getting crazier, crazier, more unstable and more dangerous by the day, also known as the Georgia Tech Massacre on April 16, 2007 in which thirty-three people were killed, mostly college students, a horrible heart? – Heartbreaking event claiming the unwanted title as the deadliest shooting in modern US history? Even when our girls are successful and mature women, even mothers, they will always be our daughters and our hearts can never be separated from the anguish of protecting them and keeping them safe and out of harm’s way.
I remember when my two daughters went off to college. It was a transformative experience. All grown up, leaving home and ready to take on the world, they were still more vulnerable than they thought, but I knew it despite their words of comfort and parting: “Don’t worry, Dad. I’ll be fine.” “As parents, ‘good’ is what we pray for.
Here are some sobering thoughts from OnlineLawyerSource.com:
1. “Statistics of sexual assault, including female college students, have been the subject of several studies. In a 1988 national study involving 32 college campuses, it was found that one in four female students was the victim of rape or attempted rape. Some studies have suggested sexual assault Statistics among college students is so high because of the role of alcohol and drugs Many women believe that you cannot report a sexual assault against a person if they have been drinking or intoxicated, but this is not That’s right. Sexual assault is rape and being intoxicated doesn’t mean the law no longer applies.”
2. “Sexual assault statistics show that 17 percent of reported cases against women resulted in injured victims. Sexual assault statistics from the National Victim Center and the Center for the Investigation and Treatment of Crime Victims from 1992 reported that 80 percent of sexual assault survivors knew their assailant at least by sight. The impact of sexual assault can be physically, psychologically, and emotionally damaging, and denial is particularly strong in victims who knew their assailants.” .
So how do we protect our children, especially our daughters, when they are off to college and away from home, helping to ensure their peace of mind and ours? One way is to give them a female self defense workshop. Our girls are more likely to be attacked, mugged, and potentially raped when they are alone, perhaps walking to their bedroom at night, shopping, even studying in a secluded library. There will be times when you are alone… and potentially vulnerable.
Vulnerable is to say if they do not have skills to defend themselves. The reality is that women who defend themselves in an attack have a better chance of surviving than those who do not defend themselves. Predators prey on the weak, not the strong. When faced with an intimidating adversary, predators move on to other prey, weaker prey. Giving our girls the gift of empowerment through self-defense lessons for women helps them protect themselves when we can’t. After all, when our children become adults, it is their responsibility to protect themselves. Having them study martial arts or taking a self-defense workshop (maybe with mom) designed especially for women is one way to help them help themselves. It is also a means by which we, as loving parents, can help ensure the safety of our beloved sons and daughters, especially when they are bound for college.
The 4 As of Self Defense
As a professional martial arts instructor and owner of my own karate studio for over thirty years, here are some valuable tips that can help anyone protect their life:
Having the right mindset is critical to survival. We call this the 4 As of Self Defense.
1.Awareness. Don’t be careful, be aware. Awareness is critical no matter where you are. It’s also important to know who’s watching you: whether you’re in a grocery store, a gas station, a department store, a park, wherever, always check your surroundings. This is your first line of defense.
2. Attitude – To survive, you must have a survival attitude, having chosen in advance that you will fight to survive and not simply accede to your attacker’s demands. Be like the sun: life gives in its heat but burns if someone gets too close. Another analogy is being like a lioness: loving her cubs unless someone tries to hurt them, at which point she becomes a fierce adversary. Also, keep in mind that you are not a victim. Your attacker is the victim. Throw the assault coin. Attack your attacker. Finally, you must have an undying will to survive. If your opponent’s will to harm you is stronger than your desire to live or stay safe, your chances of victory are not good. In an attack situation, your will to survive trumps all else.
3. Assault – Being passive in a physical assault is a recipe for being assaulted or worse. In the early, non-physical part of a potential situation, passivity may be necessary, but if the action turns physical, fighting and being aggressive in fighting is the remedy for survival. The famous General George Patton said: “In war, the only true defense is offense.”
He was absolutely right. From my professional point of view and tens of thousands of hours of teaching self defense in all my decades of teaching, your chances of victory are much better when you attack. You have more options and virtually infinite capabilities. However, a defensive posture is limited and defeat potentials are increased because by being defensive we become reactive and action is always faster than reaction. Therefore, we must be very proactive and aggressive if we choose to survive a physical assault.
4. Insight – These are defense skills including finger pricks, stabs, and claws at your opponent’s eyes; blows with the palm of the hand also in the eyes or in the face, especially with double blows of the palm under the chin; knee strikes or kicks to the muzzle or knees. Taking a self-defense class at a reputable, local self-defense studio will help greatly.